Chapter 1
There is a mission....
Which no mortal man....
Has ever completed.....
And that mission is....
To get a (censored) raid right!
To err is human, and a person is smart while people are dumb. Imagine the consequences of having any number of erring humans (usually a multiple of six for some odd reason) trying to complete a goal that a single person could. Except they think that having six times as many people means they can go six times faster. WRONG.
A sad instance of this was the great Rubi-Kaan Pwnage in the face, an event that will forever live in the pages of History of the great desert planet.
Probably scribbled in miniscule text inside the index pages of a computer manual so that nobody ever sees it....
It started out innocently enough. Mind, a metaphysicist, Keeper, a doc, Quieromorir, an engineer, Tropicana, a refreshing fruit drink... er fixer, Snooklear, a nanotechnician, and Windam, an ARK, were all set to find and disable a wierd looking bomb.
"Are we all set to go?" Keeper asked cheerfully after casting his only buff, gargantuan health.
Windam grabbed his Nerf-Stick. "As ready as one can be."
"Estoy listo para el fin," Quieromorir replied.
Everyone turned to look at him. "Wot?" Tropicana asked.
"Don't mind him," replied Mind, waving his hand and staring off determinedly into space, as he usually did. "He's just a Mexican Goth, that's all."
"A what?" Snooklear asked, looking at Quieromorir, who was in a black poncho with a black sombrero and dual wielding skull maracas. "You can do that?"
"Are we all ready to go?" Mind asked quickly, as if to change the subject.
"Are you?" Windam asked.
"No, I just said that to change the subject."
"Wootles let's go!" Tropicana chirped, and burst through the door of the mission's atrium room.
A few seconds later she zoned back in. "Wrong door," she muttered, her grid armor head slowly becoming red, making it a pretty purple color. "This way then!"
She burst through the room to see two trained assassins ready to attack her.
Attacked by Seasoned Assassin!
Attacked by Seasoned Thug!
Quickly she whipped out her dual machine pistols and let loose a volley. The assassin was driven back as blow after blow made explosions of blood burst out of his skin, but the thug didn't even seem to notice.
"A little help here!" shouted Tropicana as her last bullets exited her pistols and she fumbled with the ammo trying to reload them both at the same time with only two hands.
"We're still buffing," Snooklear replied. "Want a humitidy extractor?"
Tropicana ducked as a silver spiked mace whirred over her head. "Yeah that'll do me a lot of good! Where's the doc I need healing!"
"You're at full health!" shouted Keeper in reply. "He hasn't even hit you yet!"
Mind strode through the door to where Tropicana was duking it out with the thug.
"Silly girl," he mused. "Watch this."
He strode over behind the thug, carefully avoiding the swinging maces, and careful not to listen to Tropicana as she squeaked in fright.
Then when he was right behind the thug, he tapped it on the shoulder and said "STARING CONTEST!"
The thug whirled around and gazed into Mind's eye. No, not THE mind's eye, it's kinda hard to do that.
"How is that supposed to kill him?" Tropicana asked, clutching her smashed shoulder and trying to recover her breath.
"It's not. You're supposed to kill him while we're staring down. And do hurry, I'm getting dry eyed."
"You never blink!" Tropicana shouted as she watched Mind stare down the huge trox thug. "You're always staring off into space and your eyelids never move!"
"I'm not used to staring into EMPTY space!" Mind replied.
Windam dove in, his nerfbat flying every which way, but it snapped in his hands when it made contact with the thug.
"CURSE YOU ASHEAL!" he shouted as he was beacon warped to teh ARK office.
[Team] Windam: Darn! They got me! I can't come back, sorry...
Windam left your team.
Luckily Quieromorir and Snooklear were there to take his place while Keeper rushed to Tropicana's aid
"Tengo un regalo para ti!" Quieromorir shouted as he repeatedly smaked the thug with his twin skull maracas.
Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha Cha
By a meaningless coincidence similar to the one that had named some odd place in the distant galaxy "France", that happened to be the Assassin's favorite song, and somehow gave him the last strength he needed to crawl away from the brink of death. Figuratively, since he was nowhere near the Adonis anyway. He analyzed the situation and knew what was going on immediately.
Having learned in his Anatomy Lesson (along with +9 damage, wootles!) that it is impossible to keep one's eyes open when you sneeze, he whipped out a vial of pepper and chucked it at Mind's face.
Snooklear saw what was happening, and launched a nanobot attack that instantly killed the assassin (and blasted him like a ragdoll into the wall behind him for good measure), but it was too late, the vile vial was already careening straight towards....
AH-CHOO!
The five spent the next fifteen minutes at the reclaim terminal before promptly deciding it was all fishbowl's fault, and that it was time to get a 6th person and do another mish.
End Chapter.
Hope u all enjoid. If you wish to submit your char to be in this series (should I be making more) then send me a pm on the forums or send Rimor's Brokenminded a /tell, describing your character in terms of profession, style, and personality.
Also looking for someone who speaks fluent other languages, including spanish. If you look closely at what Quieromorir says and you hablas espanol, you'll probably notice some gramatical errors.
TY for reading. See you all soon!